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Mirror, mirror on the wall
Do you have to tell it all?
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Where do you get the glaring light
To make my clothes look just too tight?
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I think I'm fine but I can see
you won't cooperate with me;
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The way you let the shadows play
You'd think my hair was getting gray.
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What's that, you say? A double chin?
No, that's the way the light comes in;
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If you persist in peering so
You'll confiscate my facial glow,
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And then if you're not hanging straight
You'll tell me next I'm gaining weight;
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I'm really quite upset with you
For giving this distorted view;
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I hate you being smug and wise -
O, look what's happened to my thighs!
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I warn you now, O mirrored wall,
Since we're not on speaking terms at all,
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If I look like this in my new jeans,
You'll find yourself in smithereens
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